Lavender Haze

On May 5, 2026March 31, 2026 By kyndarisLeave a comment

Single’s Awareness Day is often a day of mourning for this blogger. I am, after all, single. And, as the years have gone by, I have resigned myself to the fact I might never find my second half. This is, in spite of the fact, I am constantly reading a horrendous amount of smut on AO3 (please NEVER look at my tabs. Those are sacred!) and kicking my feet when a couple acts incredibly sweet in an actual published novel (though the genre cannot ever actually be romance. What romance that does exist must solely be a subplot in the grander scheme of saving the world).

Still! Valentine’s Day 2026 was not without its own surprises as my family and I enjoyed our last full day in Launceston. But while I was not able to attend a pre-release event for Disney Lorcana, we did nip down to the Harvest Market, which is located in the carpark of 71 Cimitier Street.

While my stepfather remained in the hire car, me, my mother and Popo disembarked to take a gander at what was on offer. Though not as large or as impressive as the The Rocks Markets that can be found in Sydney, the Harvest Festival did have its own share of interesting produce and food options. As our family had enjoyed a hearty breakfast before venturing out, I settled on grabbing a snack for the drive ahead. This included picking up a bubble waffle drizzled in Tasmanian honey and a small hot chocolate to keep me going.

Bound to her wheelchair, Popo simply enjoyed taking in the sights and sounds of a bustling marketplace. But while I did have her try some of my bubble waffle, she was more enthralled by people-watching as we waited for my mother to return with a batch of specialised eye drops from a nearby chemist.

From the Harvest Market in the city centre of Launceston, we headed to the Bridestowe Estate – one of the world’s finest lavender farms. Of course, given the fact it was February, the lavender was not quite as vibrantly spectacular as they would have been in December and January. Rather, most of it had dried out. Admittedly, there was still a dull haze in the air.

Both my stepfather and mother headed down the rows to take in the view and snap whatever quality photos they could given the season. Meanwhile, I kept my grandmother company before taking the time to peruse the items on sale – purchasing for myself a set of lavender scented soap. Once my mother returned, we bought some lavender infused ice cream to try out.

From Bridestowe, we returned to Launceston to pay a visit to a nature preserve set in the middle of a lagoon. Tamar Islands Wetlands Centre lies on the outskirts of Launceston and is abundant with plant and animal life. Though it was roughly lunch time, our family enjoyed a short traipse along the accessible boardwalk taking in the views of the tall native Tasmanian grasses. Along the way, we gawked at the gulls and swans in the distance. We even spotted a copperhead snake lying in wait though it was gone by the time we returned to the visitor centre.

The visitor centre itself was fairly small with a tiny exhibit on the wildlife of Tasmania. Though there were a number of pamphlets, it seemed like the Tamar Islands Wetlands were visited primarily by citizen scientists or birdwatchers. Tourists such as my family never stayed for long before losing interest.

By the time we returned to our car, it was mid-afternoon. Hungry, we stopped by Saigon Kitchen, a Vietnamese restaurant located on Brisbane Street. As the rest of my family enjoyed some hearty pho, I grabbed a banh mi instead. Mostly because it had been a good long while since I had one as my favourite local one closed several months back.

With our stomachs full, my mother and I traipsed over to the local pedestrain shopping mall. There, I checked out the local EB Games and debated the logistics of purchasing more Disney Lorcana cards or whether or not I ought to refrain (spoiler alert, I did not buy the Brave Little Prince Mickey playmet though I was tempted). As my mother ducked into the nearby Myers, I also stopped to have a look at a local bookstore: Quixotic Books. Though no one tilted against windmills while there, I took a gander at some of the secondhand books on display and their small section of fantasy novels.

Once I had satiated my curiosity (even though I did leave empty-handed), my mother and I returned to the restaurant to rejoin the rest of the family and head back to our accommodations.

After an arduous day out at Cradle Mountain the day before, all of us were agreed a quieter day of rest was needed to recover our spirits and prepare us for when we would be heading to Hobart the next day.

Could I have gone back to the city centre to partake in more Disney Lorcana? Perhaps. But the thought of heading back out after a big morning out felt like anathema to my state of mind. Besides, it was easier to watch the Winter Olympics on the TV and enjoy a sedate Saturday afternoon as I played more of Pokemon Legends: Z-A.

Yet as my mother and I lounged on the couch, we snuck in a movie – letting it take us on a journey to the fantastical imaginings of what it would be like to live in a world where dinosaurs had been let loose on the world in Jurassic World Rebirth (which, if I’m being honest, simply does not hold a candle to the very first Jurassic Park and fails to inject the sense of awe we all felt during that brachiosaurus scene even as it tries to emulate it to the best of its ability).

So ended our last day in Launceston. Next stop: Hobart!

How Far I’ll Go

On April 12, 2026February 20, 2026 By kyndarisLeave a comment

An oft overlooked gem, Tasmania is often jokingly considered irrelevant to mainland Australians in favour of us taking over New Zealand. Yet with Valentine’s Day creeping up on the horizon (as well as the Lunar New Year), my family thought now was an excellent time to pay a visit to the southernmost state for some recreational family bonding.

Travelling with my grandmother (also known an Popo) can be difficult. With limited mobility, it is hard for her to walk. As such, we often bring a foldable wheelchair with us when we go anywhere local. On our trip to Tasmania? We brought it along, wheeling her to the door of the plane. Virgin Australian and Qantas were quite accommodating with our accessibility requests. Popo never had to wait long for our wheelchair to be brought over so she could be slowly wheeled out afterwards. The weight and relatively compact size of the wheelchair also meant we were able to easily pack it into the hired care along with all of our luggage.

It was mid-afternoon when we landed in Launceston. After we briefly stopped at our accommodation in Youngtown, my family set out for Cataract Gorge, which sits just to the west of the city centre.

According to the brochure, Cataract Gorge was created during an earthquake that occurred when Australia broke away from the continent of Gondwana. It is believed volcanic activity dammed the Tamar Valley, leading to the formation of a freshwater lake. This later eroded over the course of 10 million years with the river system carving out a new landscape. Cataract Gorge, itself, only emerged in the last 20,000 years when ice in Tasmania’s mountains finally melted.

Though there was still time for us to take the chairlift to the original Cliff Grounds Reserve, my family decided simply to take a simple walk around the Basin and over towards the great Alexandra Suspension Bridge. With Popo in a wheelchair, we weren’t entirely certain how it would be brought along with us.

As we slowly made our way around the track, I spotted a peacock craning its head past some rocks. As is my want, I quickly snapped a shot. Further up, a small gathering of people were crowded around an echidna digging for insects to eat. So, of course, I snapped a photo of that as well.

The other fauna I saw included a number of guinea fowl. While I would have liked to have caught one for dinner, my family decided it would be best to try something a little different. After our walk around the basin, we headed to Pachinko located in the city centre – a quaint Japanese restaurant with a slightly limited dinner menu that was, nevertheless, enjoyable.

Friday dawned bright and early for us as we were intent on heading up Cradle Mountain. Initially declared a scenic reserve in 1922, it was later designated a national park in 1947 – a vision borne from Austrian-born Gustav Weindorfer and his wife, Kate. Given that it is also an alpine region, the weather on the mountain can change rapidly and frequently. It is due to this very reason that some people have died while hiking the mountain or have gone missing (as in the case of Belgian woman, Celine Cremer).

From Launceston, we had to first stop by the small town of Sheffield. Yet, while Cradle Mountain was the main draw, Sheffield was also its own marvel with its variety of murals on display near the visitor centre and all across the main street. These were all vibrant, with many exploring intricate themes while others were a tad silly. The ones I liked best seemed to evoke a sense of adventure.

After grabbing a hot chocolate, we hopped back into the car for our way up to Cradle Mountain. At the visitor centre, we purchased a park pass and a shuttle ticket to get up to Dove Lake. Despite the inclimate weather, there were many visitors in attendance. As we waited in line, I heard snippets of Chinese, German and even Spanish!

Once at Dove Lake, we paid a visit to the Boat Shed, which lay on the shore. Given the chill wind, my family then retreated to the shelter of the shuttle stop to have a spot of lunch (and mostly to keep an eye on Popo as the walks around Dove Lake weren’t as conducive to wheelchairs as we had hoped) though I decided to take a gander at Glacier Rock.

It was not long before a shuttle came trundling up to the stop and our family hopped on to head back down to the carpark. After much hewing and hawing (my stepfather had wanted to visit Lake Saint Clair – unfortunately, it was another three hour drive around the mountain), we decided to return to Launceston via Devonport (a coastal city where the Spirt of Tasmania calls home).

Whilst I would have preferred staying a little longer at Cradle Mountain (mostly to pay a visit to Waldheim – the chalet built by the Austrians who would declare the mountain a national park), it was not to be.

Along the way to Devonport, we stopped by Waratah – snapping a shot of the waterfall located in the very heart of the town itself.

Devonport, itself, is the third-largest city of Tasmania. Focused more on key sites, we headed to the Mersey Bluff Lighthouse to take photos of the coastline before stopping by the local harbour where a Spirit of Tasmania (along with a Seaport ship) was docked.

While we initially flirted with the idea of grabbing dinner in Devonport, we decided to head back to Launceston instead. There, we tried out Luz Restaurant, which was located in what felt like a refurbished waiting room of an old manor or hotel (with the entrance serving as a fire door). While I was a little puzzled by its presentation, the food was delicious (if a little light in serving size for my stepfather’s tastes). Full, my family returned to the car while I vanished down a side street – paying a visit to Scenic Isle Gaming to purchase a pre-release box of Disney Lorcana Cards (Winterspell for those in the know). Which, of course, they did have. And for $30 cheaper than the usual local gaming store I do go to!

There was even a promo card attached to it (which they put in a plastic sleeve which had a picture of Raine from the Owl House. And now I’m wondering if Lorcana will ever adapt the characters FROM the Owl House into actual cards. They’ve already done the animated Lilo and Stitch and Ducktales. Why not Kim Possible and a slew of other iconic IP from my childhood?

Is my attachment a symptom of my Disney Adult-itis? Possibly. And yet the nostalgia is strong!

AND the next few sets will star PIXAR characters as well! Be still, my beating heart!

Thus ended my family’s first two days in the island state just across the Bass Strait. There would, of course, be more adventures ahead for us. After all, we had much more to see and do. And while we would miss a few iconic sights (like the town of GRINDLEWALD), I like to think we got to enjoy a balance of history and nature.

So, while we mainland Australians may joke about Tasmania never being one of us, there’s a lot more to it that meets the eye.

Veil Between (Part 1)

On February 26, 2026January 16, 2026 By kyndarisLeave a comment

It is with great sadness I interrupt my five week streak of posts related to video games by providing a segment of the short story I completed just before the end of 2025. While I have finished another video game (Stellar Blade), I have not the capacity to write up a scathing impression of it as yet (given I’ve fallen ill and I did not want to inundate you, my dear reader, with yet more chatter of video games). Still, there is much to be said of it – much of it relevant to our current climes.

Speaking of which, at time of writing, it is but the middle of January and yet so much has already happened in 2026. Not much of it good. Yet the world turns and every day fades into the next.

There are times where I feel so powerless. I have neither wealth nor a huge platform to decry the heinous acts being committed. Worst of all, I have no private military do I command to cleanse the world anew. Or, perhaps, a little black notebook to insert names I find egregious in their abuse of power.

So I sit and contemplate the legacy of humanity and whether it has all been for naught.

But my blog, of course, is not meant to be a philosophical dissection of the human condition. Rather, it’s a place I like to think I’ve carved out in the internet to showcase the things I enjoy (and perhaps bring a modicum of joy to the lucky person who stumbles upon it – be it on Tumblr or on WordPress). So, without further ado, a snippet of my recent short story (which has already been published on Fictionpress and Wattpad) to keep you amused during these troubling times:

New Orleans. French Quarter. Bourbon Street.

In the light of day, the creole townhouses, with their steeply pitched roofs and stucco exterior, were a sight to behold. To my left they served as a front to various shops targeted for tourists. I’d already picked up a fleur-de-lis magnet as a commemorative souvenir.

On my right were a number of restaurants and bars. Already, some were beginning to open, offering curious onlookers a place to try the latest libations or to have their first taste of a Cajun delicacy. The thought, however, reminded me of how I’d spent most of the night before perched over a porcelain throne. My boyfriend had peered through the crack between the door and the wall with open concern. A first for Mike. Given his usual nonchalant attitude to most things in life.

Rude, I know. But having been with him for as long as I have, I feel like I have the right.

Still, how to best describe Mike?

The two of us had met in college during a chance encounter at a frat party hosted by his friend, Sammy. I’d wanted to push the boundaries of my comfort zone. But more than that, the thought of staying in my dormitory with a less than attentive roommate addicted to video games hadn’t appealed much to my sensibilities.

This was, after all, my chance to be more than the studious nerd I’d been in middle and high school. Of putting myself out there.

Mike, the life of the party, immediately caught my eye. And he, being the confident extrovert he was, had decided it was his duty ease me into life on campus. Things spiralled from the first red solo cup I had. Before I knew it, the two of us were making out on a bed.

The rest, as they say, was history.

Seven years on and we were in the birthplace of jazz. It had been Mike’s idea to come visit New Orleans for Mardi Gras. Having never been, but also wishing to indulge my curiosity, I’d readily agreed. After all, there was just so much culture in one small southern state.

And if anyone were to say otherwise, they’d be lying.

Yes, it’s true. The two of us did struggle a little with making our relationship work. We were from two completely different worlds. He was a student of the hedonistic arts, after all. Whereas I, on the other hand, was a student of history. Somehow, though, we managed to find common ground. Namely in the appreciation of nude Grecian statues.

“Jordan! There you are! Should have known you’d end up people watching again.” Mike’s loud voice rang out across the quiet, pulling me out of my reverie. I lowered my disposable Starbucks cup of coffee and offered him a strained smile.

“Mike.”

“Listen, I know it wasn’t the best look to head out before you were even awake but there’s something I’ve always wanted to do. And last night, something came up on my Insta feed. So, of course, I DM’d the organiser. Next thing I know, I was in an empty parking lot at five in the morning.”

I squeezed the sides of my temple. “Was it drugs?”

“What? No,” exclaimed Mike. “Why would you think that? Actually, never mind. Don’t answer that.” He clapped a hand on my shoulder and pulled something from the back pocket of his designer black jeans, flashing me what looked to be a woefully crumpled handcrafted invitation. “Look. We’ve now got a bonafide ticket for an actual séance! With ghosts and maybe a Ouija board thrown in.”

“You can’t be serious, Mike.”

“Oh, come on, Jordan. Are you telling me you’ve never once sat around with a few friends and tried out a Ouija board?”

I stared Mike dead in the eye. Something not too difficult to do given there was only an inch or two difference between us.

Michael Davis Hillier was a tall wiry man with a mop of unruly dark brown hair that somehow looked styled even though it wasn’t. A loose strand trailed down towards his jawline, accentuating his sun-kissed south European skin. He was wearing a fitted rainbow button-down shirt and a blue scarf thrown stylishly over one shoulder.

Mike, as always, oozed confidence.

In contrast, I had a more solid build than my boyfriend and was developing something of a stomach. Much to my chagrin. My style, to Mike’s displeasure, veered more towards comfort. I was wearing an open red plait shirt with a white tee beneath, denim shorts and a pair of loafers. My shoulder length hair was tightly braided and pulled back with a tie.

“Do I look like a teenage girl in a horror movie? I’m not fucking out of my mind. You don’t mess with that shit,” I said. “It’s bad juju.”

Mike let out a laugh, clapping a hand on my shoulder to steady himself. “Oh, come on. You’re not saying the rising star of the anthropology department believes in superstitions, do you?” When I did not respond, he pressed on. “Fine. I’ll make you a deal. If anything bad happens, we can go to the cathedral in Jackson Square. Maybe find a priest who can pray the bad juju away. How’s that sound? I mean, it’s not like it helped with the gay, but it might work this time round.”

“I hate you.”

“No,” said Mike, leaning in close. “You hate that you love me.”

I hummed under my breath, allowing myself to be pulled in. “Maybe.”

A grin broke across Mike’s lips. He closed the space between us and kissed me. Slow and deep. I couldn’t help but kiss him back with the same amount of verve, lost in the sensation.

Despite all the fights, Mike and I always came back to each other.

He pulled away first. “So, 9 PM? I’ll text you the details later,” he said, breath ghosting over my own.

“Do I really have to?”

“It’ll be fine, Jordan,” said Mike. “Why not, you know, just live a little. For me? Please?”

I looked up into his stormy grey eyes that changed to suit the weather. They were such a contrast to my own dark brown ones.

“Fine,” I conceded. “But only because you were polite. And also because I want to feel morally superior when, after everything is said and done, absolutely nothing happens and you get proven wrong for the umpteenth time. Like, come on, Mike. A séance? Ghosts? When do we think we’re living in? The late 1800s?”

“Funny you should mention that. One of your favourite authors was an ardent supporter of everything mystical. Including fairies.”

“You’re lying. Who?”

Mike danced away from me. It was only then I realised he’d taken my disposable Starbucks cup and finishing off the last dredges of my coffee. He made a show of it. Because, of course, he did.

“That’s my little secret.” He turned to leave, vanishing into the ever-growing crowds on Bourbon Street before I had the chance to chase after him. The last I saw of Mike were the flash of his fingers as he cheekily saluted his goodbye.

No doubt he was already trying to figure out how to hit the most bars before the event tonight. The real question was whether or not he’d have sobered up enough before the séance.

A thought I shoved to the back of my mind. It wasn’t my responsibility to keep one eye on him. I had my own plans. None of which included playing nursemaid to an irresponsible manchild. With a heavy sigh, I decamped from my quiet spot at the corner of a hotel and headed further down towards the Mississippi river.

My walking tour was scheduled to start in thirty minutes.

It was five minutes to nine when I arrived outside the intimidating colonial style house painted all in white. I double-checked the address Mike had sent me after I’d reminded him thirteen minutes after seven I still didn’t know where I was meant to go for the séance.

The house sat on the outskirts of the French Quarter, facing the river. Simple ionic columns adorned the front porch, framing the door painted a dark blue. Panelled windows, their shutters open, stared over a neatly trimmed symmetrical front yard with its waist high hedges. Two stone benches sat underneath.

The British colonial style was a symbol of a time long past where my ancestors were slaves working plantations. Much had changed since then but the chains of oppression could still be felt even in the present day. Prejudices, in spite of the distance, still had a way of hanging around. Perhaps that was the reason why I climbed the stairs with trepidation before knocking on the door.

A young girl, dressed in a white shirt, black vest and tie, opened the thick oak on my third knock. She held a clipboard in one hand. “Are you here to attend Madam Xanthe’s Miraculous Spectacle?” she asked, her voice heavy with scepticism as she eyed me up and down.

“Yes. Should be under Jordan. If not, it might be under Michael Hillier.”

The girl consulted her clipboard, her finger trailing down until it landed near the bottom. She pursed her lips. “Yes. I see it now.” She stepped to the side. “The others are waiting in the foyer. Madam Xanthe’s Miraculous Spectacle will begin within the next twenty minutes.”

“Thank you,” I said. “Oh, and before I let you go, can you tell me if Mike has arrived yet?”

Instead of answering, the girl stared up at me balefully. It was clear she wasn’t keen to be here. She motioned once more for me to enter.

The body language was clear.

“Guess not,” I muttered under my breath as I stepped through the threshold and past the girl.

God. What had Mike got us mixed in this time?

Inside the tastefully decorated foyer, with its checkerboard marble flooring sat two people. One was an older gentleman dressed in a tan three-piece suit. His salt-and-pepper hair carefully pushed back in an artfully messy style. Leaning over the low coffee table, he was shuffling a deck of cards. Occasionally, he would pull one out, stare at it with a frown before returning it to the pack before repeating the procedure once more.

Closer to the entrance, ensconced in an armchair, was a younger woman who appeared to be in her early 40s. She was dressed conservatively in a long skirt and a blouse with a large round frill buttoned all the way to the top. Her hair was a shock of white though a streak of dirty blonde snaked through. It was an odd choice but who was I to judge?

A large bag sat next to her where a thread of purple yarn led up to whatever knitting project she had in her hands. From my angle near the door, it looked to be a scarf of some sort. Or maybe it was a blanket. It certainly had the width for it.

She looked up as I approached, setting her knitting to one side. “You’re not a familiar face.” The strong Scottish brogue took me by surprise.

“Jordan,” I said, stretching out a hand.

“Patrice,” she answered, giving my hand a shake. “No offence, but you don’t look the type.”

I cocked my head to the side, puzzled. “The type to what?”

Patrice gestured to the foyer. “All this. Psychics and mediums. Too much of a head on your shoulders, you.”

“And you’d be right,” I answered with a heavy sigh as I took the armchair opposite her. “All this was my boyfriend’s idea. He’s always been more interested in these kinds of things. I’d have preferred staying in a hotel room watching a documentary.”

“Maybe he wants you to experience more of the world beyond the ivory tower.”

“Maybe. But—”

I was pulled up short by the entrance of Mike. He had changed into a flamboyant glittering silver shirt that revealed his smooth chest. Skintight slacks replaced his jeans. The dress shoes, he kept, though they’d been recently polished.

Mike scanned the foyer, lavishing in the attention as all heads turned to face him, before his gaze settled on me. “Jordan! There you are! Was afraid you’d have tried to escape or called in sick last minute.” He came up to me and enveloped me in a warm embrace. The stench of alcohol was heavy despite the cologne he’d sprayed.

I forced a smile to my lips. “Wouldn’t want to miss this for the world.”

“Before you tell me off again, I want you to know that Madam Xanthe is the real deal. No parlour tricks here.”

“You’re very confident,” I said. “How can you be so sure?”

Before Mike could answer, the elderly gentleman cut in. “Stories from previous clients. Reviews. Even live footage.” He turned to Mike. “It’s…Hillier, correct? It’s a pleasure to finally meet you in person. I’m Copernicus.”

Surprise, recognition and then awe flashed across Mike’s face. He took Copernicus’ hand. “Hillier is my father. You can call me Mike. The pleasure, though, is all mine. I know we spoke of attending a séance together but I didn’t think you’d be here. Foolish, of me. Of course you’d attend in person. A chance to see across the veil? This is what we’ve dreamt about for years.”

“It is indeed. Though, had you not brought Madam Xanthe to my attention, we would not be meeting here like this.”

“And are you the client? The one seeking to commune with—”

Copernicus shook his head. “No. It seems our main guest of honour has yet to arrive.”

I watched the two of them banter, feeling out of my depth. It was like the two of them were speaking another language as they descended into conversation about something the two of them were both enraptured by.

In fact, I’d never seen Mike look so animated before. There was a feverish glint in his eye and a wide smile on his lips.

“—and this is my partner, Jordan.”

I blinked owlishly at the gloved hand proffered in my direction. “Hillier—no. Mike. He spoke of you often in our discussions,” said Copernicus. He nodded towards Mike. “You’re lucky to be with such an enterprising individual in the field of mediums and spirituality.”

Was it me or did Mike actually blush? I’d never seen him preen under someone else’s praise before. The sight made my stomach churn with something ugly I refused to acknowledge. He had never once looked at me like he did Copernicus.

With effort, I forced myself to smile as I shook the older gentleman’s hand.

“Copernicus, here, is one of the leading specialists in all things supernatural,” said Mike. “The two of us met in an online forum.”

I nodded my head. “And, um, is Copernicus your real name?”

“Well, he’s no Renaissance scholar,” admitted Mike. “Let’s just say ‘Copernicus’ is,” he snapped his fingers, trying to jog his thoughts, “an alias.”

“I see.” Silence rushed in to fill the gap. “And what’s yours? The penname you use, that is.”

Mike grinned at me in the way I knew meant trouble. “Doyle. But in the end, it was easier to use my real name.”

Of course.

He could never resist yet another dig at my expense. The very fact he chose Doyle was a means at getting back at me for whatever slight he thought I’d caused him.

“Oh, how delightful,” piped up Patrice. “Are we all part of the Peering into the Supernatural forum? I did think you looked awfully familiar, Doyle. Or do you prefer Mike?”

“It doesn’t really matter. Mike’s probably easier,” he replied. Then, almost as if it was an afterthought, he added, “Well, if you’re familiar with us then you have to be Boudicca. Although, I must say, you look a lot younger than the display picture you used.”

Patrice seemed delighted by the compliment. “It’s the make-up, sweetie. Takes off thirty years if you know how to apply it.”

“You don’t say?”

Before the two could continue, the girl who had greeted me at the door, stepped through. She did not look up from her clipboard. “Madam Xanthe’s Miraculous Spectacle is about to begin. Please follow me.” Without checking to see if we would obey her imperious command, the girl turned on her heel and marched through the door.

After exchanging a glance with all those in attendance, we scrambled after her; the sound of her heels on the marble floor the only indicator we were heading in the right direction.

The room she led us to was a dimly lit fire hazard. Hundreds upon hundreds of candles were strewn haphazardly in the small claustrophobic chamber. Some were held aloft in tall golden candelabras. Others had been placed in strategic positions around the room. All were different stages of their life. The dripping wax a sight to behold in and of itself.

But what upset me even more were how the room was decorated. The upholstery of the room could only be described as 1920s chic with its lavish and extravagant style. Heavy drapes covered the windows, blocking out even the electric light in the street outside. Ancient relics, kept safe in class cases, were tucked neatly to the side underneath various portraits of people long dead.

In the middle of the room sat a round table. Affixed to the centre was a Ouija board. Next to it was a crystal ball and a set of tarot cards in a nine-card spread. None of which had yet been flipped over.

Framed between two sticks of incense sat a dowdy woman wearing a dress my mother would have turned into curtains at the first chance. She had paired it with a gaudy gold belt around her waist. Her long curly brown hair was held back by a bejewelled head scarf.

Seated opposite her was a mousy woman dressed in a grey pencil skirt and a neat white blouse. She looked up as we entered. Her eyes narrowed. “I thought this was supposed to be a private session.”

“Crossing the veil is no easy feat. Assistance is always needed.”

The woman stood up. “I came to you in confidence. Not to be the butt of an elaborate prank.” She made towards the entrance foyer.

Madam Xanthe waved at the chair. “Adelaide—”

“It’s Adeline.”

“My apologies,” said Madam Xanthe. She gestured once more to the chair. “Adeline, please. Sit. I know the recent loss of your father has left you raw and that you seek answers. This séance, powered by those present, is your best hope.”

The words gave the woman – Adeline – pause. She worried the bottom lip with her teeth before letting out a breath and returning to her chair. “Fine.”

“Excellent.” The smile on Madam Xanthe’s face did not reach her eyes. She turned her attention to the girl. “Magdalene. Fetch the purified salt. I shall begin with the protection circles.”

Magdalene nodded, a less than enthusiastic expression on her face and vanished around the corner.

With her out of the room, Madam Xanthe motioned to the rest of us to sit down. After exchanging a glance with Mike, I took a seat to his left. Patrice plonked her knitting project next to the chair beside mine before bending over to talk to Adeline.

“It may not be my place to say this but time heals all wounds. You’ll get through this.”

Adeline offered the Scottish woman a wan smile but said nothing in return. She crossed her arms and turned to Madam Xanthe, as if waiting for the show to begin.

Like the fraud she was, Madam Xanthe made a show of her preparations. She muttered under her breath as she cast the purified salt in a circle, making sure to keep us all sequestered. Then she gazed into the crystal ball on her desk, humming in assent, seemingly pleased by what she saw.

If I were to be honest, she was sloppier than I expected.

But there was little I could do. After all, I’d made a promise to Mike. And true to my word, I was to see it through. Despite my misgivings.

Once everything was ready, Madam Xanthe instructed us all to hold each other’s hands. Mike’s hand was warm and clammy. A surefire sign he was nervous. In contrast, Patrice was dry as a bone. When I managed to crane my head over to take a peek at her, she seemed to be vibrating with excitement.

At least one of us was having fun.

“The spirits are capricious,” said Madam Xanthe, drawing our attention back to her. “They can be malevolent or helpful. Tonight, we reach across the veil and beseech their aid to call upon the ghost of Gerald William Faversham.”

“Is there anything we need to keep in mind?” asked Mike.

“Yes. Please keep hold of the hands of your neighbours as we begin the chant. And carefully enunciate as you repeat after me. It is imperative you say the words exactly as I do or else it won’t work.”

Copernicus raised a white eyebrow. “Who knew the spirits would be so exacting.”

“They aren’t,” answered Madam Xanthe with a tight smile. “I do all this to increase our chances of a positive outcome. You will appreciate that mediumship is not…a science. Nor is it replicable. What might work in one situation might not in another.”

“How terribly frustrating.”

Madam Xanthe inclined her head towards Patrice. “Still, I’ve come to find certain things help. And in this instance, I hope to use my ability to ease Adeline of the pain she carries within.” She looked around at each of us around the table. “Now, if there are no further questions, let us begin. Magdalene, please close the door and ensure we are not interrupted.”

List of Catchphrases

On January 12, 2026November 14, 2025 By kyndarisLeave a comment

In the week following PAXAus 2025 in Melbourne, SXSW descended on Sydney. With it came a Dungeons and Dragons live show at the International Convention Centre at the heart of Darling Harbour with THE Brennan Lee Mulligan (for those not in know, Brennan Lee Mulligan has a stellar reputation in the tabletop role-playing game scene) serving as Dungeon Master (otherwise known as the DM). How he managed to fit it between what he churns out for Dropout and Campaign IV of Critical Role, I’ll never know, but after seeing Critical Role live back in June 2025, I was not going to miss out on another wonderful show. Enter with me, dear reader, into the world of the Endless Dungeon.

Of course, attending such events on one’s lonesome can be intimidating. Thankfully, I knew the perfect candidate to attend with me.

Though Dikottir and I had been busy since February (with only a brief catchup at PAXAus 2025 where he saw me on the first day as we were heading in), I sent him a private message letting him know of the event. As a fan of Dimension 20 and an active subscriber of Dropout, I knew Dikottir would not miss the chance to see his hero live on stage.

The two of us met up in Darling Square, enjoying a quick meal from Spago and a scoop of Messina, before heading in to the ICC.

The Endless Dungeon, it must be said, is a teeming labyrinth of endless possibilities. Think of me, perhaps, like the dungeon in Dungeon Meshi with its own unique ecosystem including a sewerage ocean and creatures that have never seen the surface. Given its unique design, the dungeon is, itself, the perfect playground for one-shot adventures with all manner of players.

Thankfully, Australia had a number of comedians that were familiar enough with D&D to take to the stage: Jordan Raskopoulos, Tom Cardy, Demi Lardner and Zac Naoum.

While I knew of Tom Cardy (primarily for his YouTube shorts and videos, as well as the fact he was the host for Critical Role back in June), I also tangentially knew Jordan. The others, however, were a mystery though Dikottir was familiar with Demi’s work.

And if there was one word I’d use to describe the adventure on stage I’d have to go with THERAPY.

Why, I hear you ask?

Well, let’s just say Zac’s character was a failed CHOSEN one and Demi’s had a few issues with being sufficiently motivated to live life as a warlock that had a pact with infernal demons. Jordan’s wereshark pirate was still trying to process the death of their wife and Tom was desperately trying to convert the denizens of the Endless Dungeon to his faith about the fantastical sun (while also trying to get any possible followers into a pyramid scheme).

But though I’m loathe to admit it, I found the Endless Dungeon show more entertaining than the Critical Role live-play. This, of course, was primarily due to the fact Matthew Mercer and the rest of the voice acting cast were trying to tell a cohesive story that linked up to the adventures of the Mighty Nein and Bell’s Hells. Endless Dungeon, however, had no such limitations. It was essentially a comedy show dressed up as a D&D live-play with the comedians riffing off each other or bringing back gags to keep the laughs going. Whether it was between themselves or the audience.

Brennan, of course, was an excellent facilitator despite the various attempts from Demi and the others trying to derail the adventure. Always he would bring the party back together, reminding them of the story beats they had almost left on the wayside.

However, as a comedian himself, Brennan was also able to improv his own jokes and punchlines when needed. In fact, he had a few key moments that had the audience roaring in laughter. Especially when he climbed atop the table to pose like a conquering hero ready to dazzle us all with a one-liner.

Still, the synergy between the players and Brennan was electric. And despite the fact it was a worknight, I was able to forget about the hours that passed (until, at least, the intermission). By the second half, though, I was keeping an eye on the time and wondering how quickly it would be brought to an end. D&D being what it is, sometimes poor dice rolls can be disastrous for players. Thankfully, many of them were able to pick up on the hints Brennan left for them and the key villain was able to be vanquished right at 11PM.

Once it was over, Dikottir and I made our way to our respective transportations back home. For me, the trains. For him, the light rail.

Admittedly, I do think he enjoyed The Endless Dungeon much more than I did. Like Sorrengail, Dikottir tends to lean forward in his seat when it’s something they enjoy. Granted, though, the two of them are fairly tall so it might also be a way the two of them can sit more comfortably? As a relatively short person the struggles of being 170cm or higher remains a mystery to me. And I tend to sit back in my seat to allow my legs some room to stretch.

Overall, though, The Endless Dungeon was a great evening out. Would I have preferred it on a Friday night? Absolutely. But such an opportunity is few and far between for us nerds here in Australia.

I, for one, am quietly hoping for the return of Distant Worlds to return to our shores. In the meantime, I’ll take what I can.

Who knows, maybe I’ll even try my hand at writing up my own stand-up comedy set! Goodness knows several people in my life have said I’m funny (though I don’t really see it).

Admittedly, if it allows me to appear on stage with those I admire (from afar), why not?

After all, you only live once right? Why not take what chances you’re given and try something new? And given this post will be uploaded not too long after we ring in 2026, it seems like the perfect resolution to make now that I’ve some freedom.

That said, my love life is still a barren rock. While some of my work colleagues DID tease me and say our outing to The Endless Dungeon was a date, I like to think it was more an outing with a friend. We may still not be besties but at least we’re getting to know each other better? At least this is how this asexual is going to view it.

If anything does come of it, dear readers, you will be the first to know.

Choo! Choo!

On January 5, 2026November 8, 2025 By kyndarisLeave a comment

It was a cold and blustery Sunday morning when bleachpanda and I headed over to the distant suburb of Belgrave. Eschewing the third day of PAX, the two of us had arranged for a train ship out in the quiet Victorian suburbs and to enjoy some high tea once our little steam engine reached its stop at Lakeside. But first, there was the whole ordeal of getting there. Especially with the ongoing trackwork on the line.

Having researched all this beforehand, the two of us woke early. Thankfully, our hotel was close to a local bus station. The bus in question, the 907, took us to station unaffected by the closures. Mitcham is a small commuter railway station on the Belgrave and Lilydale lines.

When we arrived, our train was pulling into the station. Bleachpanda and I quickly descended the escalator and hopped on. From there, it was a another twenty odd minutes or so to the station at the end of the line (as it was an all-stops train and because Belgrave sits about 36km away from Melbourne’s CBD). Once we arrived, we wended our way through the back exit of the station, making sure to tap our Myki cards, as we followed the signs to the one and only Puffing Billy.

According to the pamphlet we were handed as we picked up our tickets, the Puffing Billy Railway was one of four narrow-gauge railway lines built in Victoria back in December 1900 to open up more remote areas. This track, originally spanning 29 kilometres, traced a scenic route from Upper Ferntree Gully to Gembrook (which was once a busy centre for the transportation of timber and farm produce).

During its nearly 125 year history, the railway was closed briefly in 1953 following a landslide and mounting financial losses at the time. Following its closure, though, the Puffing Billy Preservation Society was formed to keep the railway running and it reopened services in 1955 (with further work done in 1962, 1965, 1975 and 1998).

For bleachpanda and myself, we would be taking it only to Lakeside Station.

And what a ride it was!

With our feet dangling out the windows (although technically I was the only one out of the two of us who did it and even then, not for long), we watched the countryside flash past us. Munching on our snacks, we enjoyed a day out looking at nature. That said, it was a little nippy and the two of us, unfortunately, had not dressed as warmly as we should have.

Still, I have to admit, it was good to see train enthusiasts waving at us as we passed them by. There’s something uniquely human in that brief connection that filled me with a sense of wonder.

Once we arrived at Lakeside, we headed towards the the Visitor Centre where the cafe was located for our high tea lunch. Though the sandwiches were passable, I was a little confused at the selection of salami and prosciutto selections at the bottom. The scones, too, were a lot more filling than I expected. That said, they were tastier than the too sweet macarons.

After we finished filling our stomachs, bleachpanda and I took a stroll down past Lake Treganowan in Emerald Lake Park. To our dismay, it started to rain. Fortunately, the two of us had thought ahead (or I did because I was checking the daily forecast) and had brought umbrellas.

While I would have preferred a sunnier day, I suppose I should have been thankful it didn’t storm and turn our entire expedition out into some disaster. We even got to venture through an amateur art gallery filled with paintings of animals and iconic Australian scenery.

The train ride back on the Puffing Billy saw us sit facing the other side (which we missed out on the ride over to Lakeside). Snapping a few shots, I was lulled by the motion of the steam train and my natural circadian rhythm to nap for a few minutes as we returned to Belgrave and ‘civilised’ society.

After we pulled into the station, bleachpanda and I took a gander at some of the souvenirs. I picked up a fridge magnet while bleachpanda spent a pretty penny on a t-shirt for her niece. Then it was back to Belgrave train station. This time round we took the train all the way to Camberwell before taking a shuttle bus all the way to Parliament.

By then, it was nearing dinner so the two of us headed to Ikkoryu Fukuoka Ramen. And while the food was decent (though I did ask for normal noodles and feel like I got hard instead), I felt it was a little overpriced for what it was. Admittedly, it was also a Sunday (which would have added a hefty surcharge).

As bleachpanda and I sat and ate a nice warm soupy meal to combat the freezing temperature outside, I couldn’t help but take in the other patrons. A vast majority were PAX goers that had, presumably, enjoyed their Sunday in the Melbourne Exhibition and Convention Centre.

Stomachs full, bleachpanda and I braved the sudden storm blowing through Melbourne CBD in order to return to our hotel.

The trip to Melbourne had come to a close. While I would have liked it much better if bleachpanda had purchased me the steam paddleboat Lego set at the airport, I like to think it was a good trip. After all, she hadn’t threatened to murder me as much as she did when we were in Japan!

While I can’t say when my next trip will be, I am hoping for a nice extended holiday overseas. Maybe a country with rolling hills and nice cottages that appeal to my sensibilities.

Time will see if my dreams come to fruition.

2026 is a new year filled with all manner of possibilities. Here’s hoping I can find the one thing I’ve craved for as long as I’ve been alive.

2025: Stoking the Fires

On December 26, 2025December 25, 2025 By kyndarisLeave a comment

This year has seen many personal ups and downs. With its end, though, there has been some relief from the burdens I’ve carried as the sole carer for my elderly grandmother. And yet, I cannot say 2025 was a good year. The world continues to be thrown into chaos. Divisons between communities continue to deepen. And hate continues to pervade the headlines.

Let’s start from the beginning shall we?

Perhaps it was apt that 2025 started with an attack on New Orleans where a truck rammed down pedestrians on Bourbon Street. 15 people were killed and another 57 were injured. Fortunately, such worries were brushed aside following the funeral of Jimmy Carter (who had passed in 2024). And then, the unthinkable happened: Justin Trudeau resigned. He would be replaced by Mark Carney, a position he retained following a snap election later in the year.

To appease the new zeitgeist, Meta (parent company of Facebook and Instagram) decided to remove moderation of content on their platforms, as well as to push pages that were more political in nature (primarily conservative).

But all this was quashed by the brutal wildfire in Los Angeles (which, undoubtedly, was a Republican plot to destroy more parts of the Democratic stronghold. I jest, of course, but maybe there is some merit to it? I like to think so, anyway). Many homes, including those belonging to celebrities, were destroyed. The community, though, came together and looked to restore what had been lost.

January also saw the first of a ceasefire from Israel and Hamas. Further strikes would launch in March. There would be another ceasefire and then more conflict. Israel, as always, proving to be the instigator in many of the atrocities in Gaza. As the conflict heated up over the course of 2025, protests would be held to stop the fighting. However, like a cornered animal, Israel would continue to lash out – striking out at enemies in Iran, Syria and even a base in Qatar. It is not until late 2025 that a peace plan is signed though Israel would continue to launch several attacks on Palestinians in Gaza (and even send missiles towards Lebanon).

2025 also saw additional competitors to US generative AI modules, including the likes of DeepSeek (which was created using open-source and at much cheaper costs than US equivalents). While this shakes the market, AI technology would continue to dominate. As of time of writing up this post (Christmas Day), the bubble has yet to burst.

Late January would see Donald Trump ascend once more as the president of the United States of America. This is in spite of the fact he was impeached before AND was found guilty of several felonies. As one of his acts, Trump threatens tariffs for Mexico and Canada while also placing heavy tariffs on China. These would be delayed multiple times but he would later place a blanket 10% for all countries that would go into effect come August. Many other trading blocs impose reciprocal tariffs though there would also be several countries who would negotiate with the US to lessen the blow to their respective industries affected. Even Australia would throw its hat in the ring though the wins were few.

In other parts of the world, Sara Duterte, the vice-president of the Philippines would be impeached. Sweden suffered a mass shooting at a local school. In support of ousted president, Yoon Suk Yeol, there was the rise of the White Skull Squad in South Korea.

Back in the US, Elon Musk would be assigned to the Department of Government Efficiency (or DOGE for short). They would fire many federal workers only to rehire some of them. This was mostly due to the DOGE only having a shallow understanding of many important roles.

The US would also see the mass deportations of Venezuleans to an El Salvador prison despite no proof they were part of criminal gangs. However, it would not stop there. ICE would grab civilians off the streets if they believed the person was an unlawful non-citizen. Mass protests would ensue in several major cities. This, unfortunately, would lead to crackdowns from the Trump administration where the National Guard would be sent in (without the consent of the State governor).

As 2025 marched on, ex-Philippines president Duterte (father of Sara Duterte) would face trial at the International Criminal Court. The Sudanese army would seize the presidential palace in Khartoum following two years of civil war. In Turkiye, protests would erupt as a presidential challenger is detained.

There would also be smaller events including the leaking of US military plans to a journalist who was mistakenly added to a Signal group. Wildfires would ravage Korea and the Unification church in Japan was ordered to be dissolved. In Myanmar and Thailand, a earthquake would kill hundreds. Elsewhere in the world, Pakistan would repatriate approximately 80,000 Afghans who had fled to the country.

Early 2025, with DOGE still running rampant, also saw Tesla stocks fall drastically. Thousands would protest, causing damage to Tesla dealerships or attacking owners of the cars themselves.

In some mixed news, three direwolf pups would be brought back from extinction.

Alas, the world would continue to fall into disrepair. Following an appearance int he Vaitcan city on Easter Sunday, Pope Francis would pass away. In his stead, Pope Leo XIV would be elected. The first American to ever be elevated to such a role.

As we headed towards the middle of 2025, tensiosn would rise between Pakistan and India following a mass shooting in a popular tourist spot in Kashmir. Southern Iran would suffer a chemical explosion, and Spain and Portugal would endure a massive blackout. Back in the US, Trump would sign an executive order to cut funding to public news outlets (a win to many who have lost faith in traditional media though getting the news from social media is, in my mind, presumably worst).

In a complete upset (though it came as a relief to me), Labor wins the Australian election in May. Peter Dutton, Opposition leader, would lose his seat. Reshuffling afterwards, Sussan Ley would take the reins. They would also see a split from the Nationals though the Coalition would reform after a week. The People’s Action Party, another incumbent government, would also win its 14th consecutive election in Singapore.

As the year rolled on, India would strike nine sites in Pakistan. In retalitation, Pakistan would shoot down five Indian aircrafts. Back in the US, Trump would be offered a private plan by Qatar to replace Air Force One. Joe Biden would then be diagnosed with prostate cancer. And, in the state of New york, a Mexican ship would crash into the Brooklyn Bridge.

Prior to Ukraine-Russia peace talks, a massive drone attack is launched on a Russian military base. Ukraine would also hit the bridge between Russia and Crimea (mostly to establish some breathing space). Unfortunately, 2025 would see the tides turn and Russia would gain more ground. As of the writing of the post, no peace plan would be formally adopted.

With many elections across the world, there would be more disruptions: Karol Nawrocki would win the Poland presidential election and Lee Jae-Myung would snap up South Korea’s leading spot. In the Netherlands, the far-right leader would quit the rocky coalition and their government collapses.

Back in the US, the One Big Beautiful Bill passes in Congress. This sees a rift form between Trump and Elon Musk, with the tech billionaire forming a new political party in opposition. Whispers of Trump’s involvement with Epstein would then begin to swirl. Ultimately, the files (heavily redacted) would release in late December.

Summer in the northern hemisphere would bring more tragedy, including severe flooding in Texas, killing hundreds. New York would also endure a flooding and Europe would face ever more severe heatwaves.

Elsewhere, conflict would arise between Cambodia and Thailand.

And as Israel proves recalcitrant in its bombing of Gaza, many countries harden their stance against it and choose to recognise Palestine as an independent state. Including, of course, Australia.

As August rolls through, postal services to the US are halted due to tariffs on goods lower than specific threshold. For Australians looking to send packages over, shipping resumes at the end of September.

September also saw a huge military parade in China featuring the likes of Putin, Kim Jung Un and previous leader of the Victorian Labor Party: Daniel Andrews. In Indonesia, protests break out – mostly against rising injustice and corruption among the elite. Similarly, Nepal also sees violent protests led primarily by Gen Z. The Nepal PM resigns and the capital burns.

Though there are no violent protests, the Prime Minister of Japan resigns (Sanae Takaichi would then be elected as the new leader of the Liberal Democratic Party) and the French one loses a no-confidence vote.

Conflict continues to stoke the world as 2025 rolls towards the end. Poland is forced to shoot down drones purportedly from Russia. In the Philippines, protests continue regarding overt corruption. Electronic Arts (EA) is purchased for $55 billion by Saudi conglomerates and goes private. In the US, Trump claims there is a strong link to paracetamol (or, acetaminophen) and autism (spoiler alert: there isn’t. The real link is most likely between high fevers and their possible impact on developing foetuses).

And, for forty days, the US government would go into shutdown. This was primarily over the lack of subsidies for health care. Following a victory in the New York mayoral election (with Zohran Momdani), eight Democrats would vote in favour to pass the budget in the Republicans favour. Trump would later sign an executive order exempting food from tariffs as inflation on grocery bills begin to bite.

Across the world, though, there would be a student led coup in Madagascar. After the president flees, the military takes over. In France, burglars would steal the Napoleanic jewels from the Louvre.

To the devastation of many, the AWS cloud unit goes down, disurpting hundreds of other platforms and websites. This would happen again when Microsoft Azure goes down. A Cloudflare outage also crashes several sites.

In royal news, the Queen Mother of Thailand, Queen Sirikit passes away. Prince Andrew, following further accusations, is stripped of his titles and is asked to leave the Royal Lodge.

With 2025 nearing the end, both New Delhi and Islamabad suffered a bombing attack. A massive fire would break out in Hong Kong, killing up to 161 people. In Benin, there was a failed coup attempt. But it was the acquisiton of Warner Bros Discovery by Netflix that surprised many. Though the deal has yet to go through, many are fearful what this could mean for the movie industry.

Back in Australia, we saw under 16s banned from social media. And, in a shocking display of cold calculation, there was a mass shooting down at Bondi Beach during a Chanukah event by extremists.

Once again, seeing how the events of the world has shaken out over the course of the year has further outlined how hate and divison had shaped politics and the way many see the world. This has only been further stoked by populist leaders looking to win clout by sowing seeds of fear and taking advantage of the pain many people feel. While I would like to think 2026 would see a return to normalcy, I cannot help but feel like we’re on a speeding train, headed towards disaster. Distrust runs rampant and society is fracturing at the seams. Authoritarianism is on the rise, corruption is rife and many world leaders look first to themselves rather than the people they serve.

But though the outlook looks bad, there is still hope. After each tragedy, people come together in the best of ways. They donate. They check in. And they uplift.

I just wish we got to see the best of humanity more often. Yet selfless acts of kindness are few and far between. And despite my jaded and cynical outlook on life, I cannot help but look for the light. There is too much wrong with the world. Why cannot we, as a people, choose to leave it a better place than we found it?

False Alarm

On December 12, 2025October 26, 2025 By kyndarisLeave a comment

Since the return of PAXAus following the disruptive events of the pandemic, I’ve been three times. Yet despite my initial excitement of attending (I mean, it’s PAX! Supposedly the slickest thing for all would-be gamers to attend), it seems fitting my lack of enthusiasm was encapsulated by an evacuation on Day 2. Orderly, though it was, it left a bad taste in my mouth. Especially since my annual pilgrimage down to the Melbourne Convention and Exhibition Centre in October would come to a halt, not with a bang, but with a whimper. And one outside of my control.

The day started off similarly to PAXAus Day 1. Bleachpanda and I enjoyed a hearty breakfast at the hotel before heading down Spencer Street. Along the way, we joined fellow pilgrims heading down to the Melbourne Convention and Exhibition Centre. Many were in cosplay while others sported iconic PAX merchandise.

Given we’d did a lot of shopping the day before (or, in this instance, I did), the two of us decided it was better to look around what indie games were on display and try our hand on a few (if we were so inclined).

But, if I’m being honest? There weren’t a lot of games that caught my eye.

Many on display had chosen to go down a roguelike route while others preferred using deck-based combat. Admittedly, there is nothing wrong with developers choosing to go down this route. It’s just that it didn’t much appeal to my sensibilities.

Take Zodiac Mountain, for example. While the premise of a panda wishing to unseat the twelve other zodiac animals in East Asian mythology was interesting, the gameplay mechanics left much to be desired. Coupled with the fact it wasn’t exactly the most polished game, I quickly lost interest.

The same went for Sinthetic. In fact, I’d even played the demo last year at PAXAUs 2024. But while the flat models for cutscenes had been refined and its cyberpunk influenced world contained a lot of promise, the gameplay simply wasn’t at a level that sold me this was a ‘must-play’ title. That’s not even mentioning the flat textures in so many parts of the world.

Still, there were several games that did catch my eye but didn’t quite sit within my wheelhouse of games I’d play. These, of course, were the multiplayer and party games. The ones you’d break out when guests are over.

As for the ones that I might add to my Steam wishlist? Gateworlds seemed charming enough even if I wasn’t sold on the graphics. There was also another game, The Hell: City Builder of the Dead (thank you Google), that had you building up numerous Cities of the Dead for various cultures (even if there was a typo in their trailer on the exhibition floor). Dikottir would later inform me he, too, liked the feel of the game. The only problem? How tone deaf it was to have victims of natural disasters consigned to the ninth circle of Hell, their souls used as resources to build up my very own Hell city.

And my final real-time strategy game that I might entertain the idea of picking up and playing? Grove Keeper. There was just something about building up a grove instead of cutting down trees for lumber that intrigued me.

Other games that intrigued me included Schrodinger’s Cat Burglar, Enfant and Bones: Wandering Soul. These games all had a distinct style to them that made them stand out from the crowd of other titles on display. Whether or not I’ll follow them until release is still up in the air.

Once we’d had a look at all the upcoming titles expected to hit Steam’s shelves, bleachpanda and I had a gander at the ‘This is an Xbox’ exhibit. Unlike Nintendo, Xbox did not have sectioned areas to play any particular exclusive. Rather, they showcased a trailer for upcoming games coming to Microsoft’s console while also showcasing the various platforms one could play games on including laptops, handhelds and normal PCs. The singular standout moment of the whole affair? Getting a Ninja Gaiden 4 fan.

Stubbornness then had me stake out the line for Pokemon Legends: Z-A. While I’d already pre-ordered the game (as part of a bundle with a new Switch 2), I also wanted to try the demo on display. Bleachpanda, though familiar with the franchise, had not played a new Pokemon game since the Gameboy Advance era. Instead of also partaking of the demo, she stood to the side to watch me figure out the controls and run around Lumiose City to the best of my ability.

It should be noted Nintendo had also brought several other games. These included, but weren’t limited to: Kirby Air Riders, Metroid Prime 4: Beyond and Mario Kart World.

Once I’d satisfied my need for try out an actual triple-A title being showcased at PAX, the two of us hurried to the panel for the Indie Symphony that had been held in Melbourne. Though the talk was informative, I found it a little too self-congratulatory. Even as it focused on the connections fostered by those already in the industry.

Still, at least we got to hear a few renditions of my favourite tunes played by orchestra. But a Distant Worlds concert it was not.

And why were these limited to Melbourne only? I would have loved for an Indie Symphony to make its way up to Sydney!

As the day was coming to a close (and a little hungry since bleachpanda and I hadn’t stopped to consider lunch), we wandered back over to the tabletop section of the exhibition hall. While there, I was tempted to pick up more Disney Lorcana cards but, through sheer will power, managed to refrain. Instead, we made our way to a stall selling dice. However, before I could decide on a set I liked, the fire alarm went off.

Initially, none moved. The alarm went on for several minutes in the background. It was only later when a staff member told us the evacuation was real and not a drill that bleachpanda and I made our way to the doors and petered out into the grass surrounding the Melbourne Convention and Exhibition Centre.

Unsure when we would be allowed back in and already disliking how packed it was within the immediate vicinity, we decided to head elsewhere for a snack. Since I wasn’t able to have eggettes (also known as egg waffles) while in Hong Kong, I was adamant to try some while in Melbourne.

While we munched on our eggettes, we soon learned the centre had been cleared. It had been determined that the evacuation had been caused by someone pulling the fire alarm though there had been no risk or threat to the attendees. In other words: a false alarm.

Knowing that by the time we returned to PAX, the exhibition hall would close, bleachpanda and I then decided to have an early dinner at Katsuhon.

So ended PAXAus 2025 Day 2.

And though I’d attended a third day the year before, I felt two was more than enough for my trip with bleachpanda. For, on Sunday, we’d indulge one of my other loves.

Trains.

Disney Shopping Spree

On December 5, 2025October 23, 2025 By kyndarisLeave a comment

My third year at PAX saw me convince my good friend, bleachpanda, to tag along despite the misgivings I had over the event during the last few years. And while the panels for PAXAus 2025 did not give me much hope for the event, the dearth of many staple exhibitors this year only furthered my feeling to give myself a break. Or, at least, consider PAXAus not as the be-all, end-all event I’d hyped up in my head.

After our day out in Melbourne the day before, bleachpanda and I had a hearty breakfast before traipsing down Spencer Street towards the Melbourne Convention and Exhibition Centre. We arrived at the doors just after 10 AM, entering into the exhibition hall with the day still young.

Almost immediately, we were inundated by the mass of attendees (even on the Friday) and those excited to try the new best thing. Though I was tempted to linger in the indie section, we were quickly drawn further into the hall. Almost immediately, we were queuing for a hobby store selling all things video games and anime-related merchandise. Before I knew it, I had a Ceruledge Funko Pop! in hand and a Tifa Lockhart Adorable Arts figure in hand. How they’d got there, I couldn’t say. It was almost like my body was moving on its own as I handed over my credit card to the cashier.

Then there was a brief detour to the Disney store where, after assessing the prices for Disney Lorcana, I settled instead for a Sven plushie (don’t worry, dear reader, I would indulge in my Disney Lorcana addiction in short order later). Cute toy in hand, bleachpanda and I trickled into the tabletop gaming area. Almost immediately, I zeroed in on the Disney Lorcana stand. While I’d not initially been drawn in by the Collection Quest that was being run, I could not resist the allure of picking up a few booster packs and a mystery bag (this would contain an Azurite Sea Illumineer’s Trove and two playmats). Much to bleachpanda’s amazement (probably because of the sheer amount of money I was throwing away at colourful cardboard cards. And to that I say, it’s DISNEY! As an out and proud Disney adult, it is my DUTY to fall for nostalgia and good artwork of my favourite Disney characters).

Determined not to make Disney my entire personality, bleachpanda and I went around the rest of the tabletop stalls to have a look at what was on offer. While I was tempted by several Disney Villain jigsaws (because the prices were a steal!) and Tea Witch, I settled for getting the core ruleset for Daggerheart instead. And, by the Gods, was it heavy!

After we’d had a quick cursory look at what else was on display, we circled back to Nova to look at their dice. Admittedly, the idea of picking up a frosted glass dice set did tickle my fancy. Alas, I held off and the two of us returned again to the Disney Lorcana stand. Here, I taught bleachpanda a little of the rules before partaking in the Collection Quest (the cards in question being part of the Azurite Sea set. And since, you know, I had an entire trove of the cards, I thought I’d be able to easily find the cards needed). Working with several others on the table, I ripped and tore my way through the packets of cards to find the ones needed.

Suffice it to say, all the people on the table managed to get all four of the promotional cards being handed out. Myself included.

Weighed down by my haul of goodies, bleachpanda and I then headed to lunch at the Boatyard. Though it was the peak of lunch time, we managed to secure a spot near the back of the restaurant.

Once we’d eaten our fill, we headed back in to PAX. This time, however, our goal wasn’t the exhibition hall but one of the many theatres. The reason? To attend a panel definitely tier-ranking video game food. And run, of course, by very serious game journalists.

While it did feel like the panel was the journalists trying their best attempt at improv comedy, I like to think there were some decent discussions on what makes food look oh so yummy on the screen.

Once the panel was finished, bleachpanda and I returned to the exhibition hall. While nothing truly caught our eye, we did try our hand at archery at the Sims stall before enteringthe queue for Blackmilk. True to form, bleachpanda tried to convince me to buy a Pokemon skirt. But while some of the designs were nice, I couldn’t help but be put off by the lacklustre materials used.

In the end, we walked out of Blackmilk empty-handed (of their products, at least) before heading to our last panel for the day: Ghost of Yotei in the Main Theatre.

Yet again the panel did not seem to have the hype I’d wanted. Rather, it felt like an extended advertisement as the developer on stage tried to steer away from any narrative spoilers. And as someone who had already purchased the game, there wasn’t anything I saw in terms of gameplay that further sold me on the premise (I mean, I’ll eventually get to it. I just have such a HUGE backlog at this stage. Which has not been made any smaller by then picking up a new Nintendo Switch 2. If I had an entire year to sit back and play video games, I MIGHT be able to get through the majority of my backlog. Honestly, if I wasn’t as interested in open-world and role-playing games, I would most definitely be more on top of the games I play).

After the panel wrapped up, bleachpanda and I headed back to our hotel on the other side of Melbourne CBD. Mostly so I could drop my heavy bags before we headed out for a late dinner.

I had HOPED for steak but bleachpanda had her eyes on Katsuhon. However, given how long the line was, we changed plans and headed to Dao Noodle instead. While it wasn’t quite my favourite, it certainly brought something a little different to the usual Chinese fare I would have while out in Sydney.

So ended Day 1 of PAXAus 2025.

Already I was dreading how much I would end up spending for Day 2 (spoilers: shockingly not as much since I knew my suitcase was already bursting at the seams and couldn’t fit much more. That said, I could have gotten more Disney Lorcana booster packs if I wasn’t being overly stubborn).

Gridlock Goldilocks

On November 26, 2025October 18, 2025 By kyndarisLeave a comment

It is a feat, in and of itself, to navigate a city even with global positioning systems in our very pockets. Some central business districts, of course, need them. What with their one way streets and confusing configuration. But I , a purported human GPS, have always found Melbourne a cut above the rest with its sensible grid-like structure.

Does it lead to a lot of wind tunnels that threaten to blow one away? Yes, but it also makes tracking down that one elusive restaurant you’ve been meaning to try for years a breeze.

With PAXAus 2025 still two days away, bleachpanda and I made our way to the capital of Victoria. I’d chosen a Wednesday primarily because I wanted to take the time to enjoy our time exploring the city (that said, the two of us had visited it multiple times separately in the past) without worrying about missing the latest gaming showcases in the exhibition hall.

After we had checked into our hotel and divested our luggage into our room, bleachpanda and I hit the streets. Our earlier flight had been around lunch time and we hadn’t had a moment to refuel. Our first stop was a local cafe where the both of us grabbed something relatively light (along with hot drinks). Once we’d eaten our fill, we hurried along the familiar streets to check out the stores any basement-dwelling weeb nerds would actually hang out in.

Those stores being, of course, Critical Hit and Minotaur. Thankfully, both are located on Little Collins Street, albeit at some distance between each other. While bleachpanda was able to buy me a cursed Blue Badger charm, I was unable to find an equivalent present for her. Nor, for that matter, was I able to locate for myself a compact paperback of John Gwynne’s Fury of the Gods. Alas, my wait was to continue before I could complete the collection.

After a late dinner, we returned to our hotel to ready ourselves for the next day: a chill Thursday when others seeking to attend PAX would descend onto the city en masse.

And while the step count for Thursday was one of the highest, I like to think bleachpanda and I got to enjoy a fairly sedate exploration. We started with a visit to the Queen Victoria Markets. Operating since 1878, the QVM hosts a wide variety of fresh produce and specialty shopping for those inclined. It was here we were joined by my good friend Sorrengail, wherein I was able to hand over a gift: a pin of Morag (one of her favourite characters from Xenoblade Chronicles 2). While at QVM, we checked out the numerous stores as we nursed our own cups of hot beverages. There was, after all, much to see and temptations galore.

From QVM, we strolled all the way down Elizabeth Street towards Federation Square. The national museum of screen culture has always been a favourite of mine. And luckily, there was a special exhibition depicting video game worlds from the 1970s to the present. Game Worlds: Playable Exhibition had us exploring the evolution of video games over 50 years: from early text-based adventures to current indie sweethearts like Hollow Knight: Silksong (a game I wouldn’t dare to play because I simply can’t ‘git gud’ enough. Although, Sorrengail did finish it during a late night karaoke out with her work friends).

I have to say, the nostalgia hit me hard when I saw Neopets being celebrated. A browser game filled with many Flash-powered minigames, Neopets was a pivotal moment of my childhood. Logging on each day to feed my pets, having my mum sign a consent form (which we sent to the offices so I could have access to other parts of the game as I was under 13 at the time), and interacting with the world at large. I’d even tried penning my own ‘choose-your-own’ adventure style narratives (though it never went far).

There were, of course, other games on display. But what took me by surprise was a small monument to Dungeons & Dragons. On the screen in the exhibit, snippets of Critical Role, Dimension 20 and a show hosted by renowned GM and player, Deborah Ann Woll were on display. Considering my current obsession with tabletop role-playing games, it was a pleasant thing to stumble upon.

That said, it should have come as no surprise. Many video games have been inspired by Dungeons & Dragons. Least of all, the Baldur’s Gate series, but even Final Fantasy can chalk some of its roots to the dice-rolling role-playing game.

Game Worlds: Playable Exhibition also showcased a number of big name titles including World of Warcraft, Elder Scrolls Online and The Sims. There were also lesser known games like Stardew Valley and Celeste. All of which attendees could sit down and play with for a few short minutes should they so choose.

The ACMI also had a dedicated free exhibition for the Story of the Moving Image. This, too, bleachpanda and I took a gander at. While there were no longer Thor costumes, there WERE a few iconic displays including a spin table for Cuphead.

Feet tired, bleachpanda and I desperately tried to find a place to sit and refuel. We stopped at ShanDong MaMa Mini in a offshoot street along Flinders Lane.

Energy restored, we ventured to our last tourist attraction for the day: SEA LIFE Melbourne Aquarium. And while there IS a SEA Life aquarium in Sydney too, there were also vast differences for what was on display. Prices, too, were far more expensive than I’d initially anticipated.

Still, I got to see a few curious cephalopods, those being the cuttlefish and an octopus, as well as a host of sea dragons and sea horses! More importantly, I got to see a host of penguins (and not just cute fairy penguins but KING and Gentoo penguins).

Honestly, the penguins made my day. I loved watching this silly goose of a penguin try and pick up rocks – only to have them slide back down on the ice. He and his mate even had to fend off another penguin looking for rocks to fill his own nest.

It was glorious!

On a side note, the aquarium also hosted a number of reptiles including snakes and lizards. While it was a little strange to me as to why they would be on display, I didn’t let it deter my overall enjoyment.

After we departed SEA LIFE Melbourne Aquarium (with some hefty spoils from my end including an octopus mug and an axolotl plushie), we returned to our hotel. Once we’d recuperated enough, we stumbled over to dinner at nearby La Cucina.

Day 1 of PAXAus was just around the corner.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

On October 26, 2025September 16, 2025 By kyndarisLeave a comment

The last two days in Shenzhen were a tour de force of catch-ups. Mostly with classmates my mother had known back in her university days, or with family friends. We also had to pick my grandmother up from the airport after she was flown in from Urumqi (where she stayed with her son for a vast majority of the trip) before prepping our own bags for the return flight back to Australia.

As is almost always the case, my mother (and, to an extent, my grandmother) are the shining stars of the family. Extroverts to their core, they know people from all walks of life. And when they reunite with those they haven’t seen for years, it’s an explosion of chatter and reminisces of the past.

I am, of course, always the stranger on the outside peering in through the window. Unable to penetrate the shared experiences they have.

Of course, being the introvert that I am, it’s no real bother to me. In fact, as I’ve grown older, I’ve come to appreciate not being in the limelight and have found ways to keep myself entertained even as my mother and grandmother bask in the attention of others. For example, reading Caitlyn x Vi fanfiction on my phone. Or scanning the headlines to see what new Hell the world might have found itself in.

So it was on the bright Thursday morning, my mother and I (along with her best friend from university) headed to Shenzhen Museum in the Futian District. Though we could have taken the metro, my mother’s friend decided going via rideshare would be both more economical and time efficient. We also wouldn’t have to deal with all the pesky line changes.

Once we arrived, and having reunited my mother with her two other friends, it was like the decades since they had last each other were nonexistent. The four of them caught up with each other’s lives as we waited for the museum to open. I kept myself apart, wanting to see how the fanfiction I was reading would pan out and mostly being invisible lest I be treated like a six-year-old instead of the thirty-something I actually.

As soon as the clock struck 10 AM, we headed into the museum proper. Unfortunately, despite its size, much of it was cordoned off. Whether it was for an event or due to renovations, I could not say. Still, we enjoyed our time going through the exhibits. The first two on ground floor were devoted to wildlife across the world. Eagerly, I snapped photos of a polar bear, hyenas, moose, porcupines and all manner of wolves. There was even a honey badger!

The second floor had exhibits detailing the history of Shenzhen and the various ethnic minorities that had called Guangdong province home. As someone who considers themself a student of history, it was interesting to read up about the intersectionality of multiple cultures and ethnic minorities. From those from Canton to the Hakka, and then to the Boat Dwellers.

Their unique cultures all had a hand in shaping the traditions and culture inherent in Guangdong province. More importantly, it speaks to how society develops over time and can learn to incorporate aspects of various lifestyles as part of the whole.

Interestingly, though the Boat Dwellers were once considered ‘lesser’ and nicknamed ‘sea gypsies,’ they have since been legally acknowledged and their civil rights and status are now equal to those who live on land. This has granted them additional protection and care.

From the early roots of Guangdong province, there was also an exhibit on the history of Shenzhen and how the city became the flourishing metropolis it is today following the policy of Reform and Opening-up.

Designated as one of the earliest special economic zones in China, Shenzhen rapidly developed and urbanised into the Silicon Valley of China. Home to various firms and large corporations, skyscrapers dot the skyline. And while it does not have the history of the likes of Hong Kong, it is still a place many young people flock to for job opportunities.

Even now Shenzhen is still developing – becoming a powerhouse in innovation and technology.

But the history of Shenzhen, at least at the museum, would not have been complete without an acknowledgement to Deng Xiaoping after he became the leader of China in 1978. As Chairman, he set about overhauling China’s infrastructure and political system, allowing China to modernise after what many would describe as disruptive years during Mao’s reign.

After we had gone through the entirety of Shenzhen’s history, we headed to the nearby Book City. A series of large book shopping malls in close proximity to each other, it is considered one of the largest bookstores in the world – hosting multiple restaurants and other non-book related shops.

Of note is the Book Bar. Open 24 hours, it serves as a refuge for anyone wanting to cram an assignment or even a place to rest. And who wouldn’t, surrounded by all those books? To my disappointment, actual English titles were few and far between and I was unable to pick up a stray holiday book to keep me company (that said, I was still reading The Constant Gardener by John Le Carre).

We had lunch in one of the restaurants and I took some time to peruse the shelves as my mother chatted with her old friends. Including another of her old classmates who had just flown into Shenzhen from Kashi (also known as Kashgar) in Xinjiang. A lecturer at university, he had also written books on key economic policies.

It was during this meeting of the minds that my mother learned my grandmother’s flight from Urumqi was delayed. As a consequence, she cancelled the dinner she had originally planned and we joined her classmate later at Baidu International Building (a search engine most of China uses as Google is blocked). The other guests in attendance, to our chagrin, were his many students.

To say it was an awkward affair is an understatement.

Thankfully, we did not stay long. It wasn’t long before my mother and I were headed to Shenzhen airport to pick up my grandmother (and to check-in at the Hyatt Regency situated right outside the airport.

The second day was a quiet affair. I spent of it playing Owlboy as we waited for our evening flight back to Australia. At around 11:30, more friends of the family (ones my mother and grandmother knew back in Xinjiang and who are complete strangers to me) came to visit from Zhuhai. After they’d chatted, we headed over to Hyatt Place, located on the opposite side of the airport, to have lunch with another family friend.

Before too long, we’d packed up the rest of our bags and headed to the airport proper (a short walk across a pedestrian bridge away). Once again, I got to enjoy the luxuries bestowed upon me as someone seated in business class. Yet despite the ability to lie down, I slept poorly during the flight and resorted to watching a few films (Paddington 2 and The Greatest Showman) to pass the time.

It was 6:23 AM when we landed back in Sydney, Australia. And I, for one, was glad to be back on home soil.

Though China remains the land where my family is from, it’s Australia I’ve come to love and feel most comfortable in. More importantly, Australia is where my friends and those who matter to me are. While it does have its faults (there are times I wish it would be more progressive in its social policies, for if it aped those in the Nordic countries, we might have less of an issue with recidivism and high prison populations), there’s a familiarity and freedom to living here.

That said, the prospect of returning to the office the day after next filled me with dread. Why had I chosen not to take a few days extra off work?

And so ended my visit to see my relatives, and to enjoy a little fun along the way. What started as a summer holiday was now well and truly over (and thank goodness for that. The humidity was an absolute killer).